Learn hypnosis from a master hypnotist

A Tip For Working with General Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

When working with clients who suffer from GAD (general anxiety disorder) I have often found that they present with ‘my anxiety just happens, it’s not about anything specific…’. In the past this was quite the barrier for me to work with, and after some time and experience with those clients I have notice some interesting things. I’ll give you two of them here, and you can let me know in the comments what you think.

1. In the intake, even with GAD clients, I have always been able to notice some triggers that make the anxiety worse or add to it. While I don’t find the ultimate trigger for everything (which is what the client is looking for), I do find something that does something. I will often start with that, and once I open those up, more often then not the rest starts to open as well.

2. When I don’t know the triggers, I check for the idea that this that there are no specific triggers and the anxiety ‘just happens’ is itself quite anxiety provoking. That idea has so far always been on the mark. Now that I have identified that global trigger, I open it up by acknowledging the positive intent behind that anxiety (more often then not it’s ‘try to figure it out so I can know why it happens so I can fix it’). Once the client clearly sees that benefit, they let it go, and that bit of anxiety is gone.

At that point I have found that the rest becomes explorable as well. And there’s a simple explanation. The anxiety of ‘just happens’ creates the tight hold on ‘I need to completely figure this out’ which makes it that the client automatically rejects anything that isn’t a full blown perfect explanation for everything, which presents as ‘I don’t know what my triggers are’. Opening up the ‘just happens’ now opens the space for us to pinpoint and pick apart the triggers as well.

What do you think? Let me know in the comments section.

Joe

March 29, 2012   No Comments

NLP’s Fatal Flaw

Hypnosis, NLP, EFT, TFT, 3d mind…

All those beautiful ‘magical’ therapies.

They all have something in common.

A fatal flaw.

A deadly paradox.

It’s always there. Always lurking below the surface. Poking its head up from time to time, only to be quickly misdirected and shifted aside.

It comes up for the practitioners. Especially the ones who get long term feedback from clients. When they dare ask the unaskable questions, they are quickly taught to get in line.

And so what delicious flaw is it that I speak of?

It’s quite simple. The one thing those therapies have in common is the core belief that problems are simply ‘mistakes’. Things that truly don’t belong, shouldn’t be there, and are therefore easily removed.

It might be with a swish pattern, a direct suggestion, a release of energy, a collapsing of anchors.

The core premise being that change is quick and easy. There is no need to work or suffer. That to assume that any change needs hard work or suffering puts one into the category of the evil psychologists and therapists (or The-Rapists as many will quip).

Well whats wrong with that! What’s so terrible about that premise! After all, I had a friend with a phobia, we did the fast phobia sure, and 4 minutes later he was standing on the roof! No pain, plenty of gain!

Well here’s the thing. While it’s certainly true that you can make change without pain. Even significant change. The idea that ALL change is easy and painless is dead wrong (and harmful).

Here’s a simple way to prove it to your next NLP trainer. Ask him why he’s overweight, or why he smokes, or why he bites his nails, or why he gets angry, or why he has any bad habits, emotions, or behaviors at all.

And he will answer that he is human and isn’t perfect.

But what does that really mean? If all change is easy and painless, then why not? Why not take an hour, and zap em all away? Why have any problem more than once in your lifetime? Why once any issue ever comes up for the first time, don’t you simply run the magical process and rid yourself of it forever and ever?

And to that, the answer is simple. While there is a lot of things you can change that is simple and easy, there are many things that will be quite difficult to change.

This makes a lot of sense as well. Sometimes the problems we have are simply the product of a larger dysfunctional system. While simple phobias are almost always an isolated pattern, things like OCD, GAD, depression, and other issues can often be part of a global stable system of dysfunction (quite often they aren’t as well and are fixed easily). If it is a whole system that supports the problem, then a simple 6 step reframe won’t do the trick.

To solve these problems you often need to do a specific piece and then let the rest of the system ‘catch up’ and fall into a new order before you can know which bit to shift next.

A good example is building an idea and a product. While some businesses and ideas can be built big straight off the bat, in some industries you need to start with one bit, let the market shape itself around that bit, then evolve the next bit, wait for the market, and so on. The internet as it is now could not have been built in one shot 20 years ago. There are simply too many supporting factors that make it possible (the amount of people with computers, the mindset of society in regards to the web, the people trained in creating content, the users trained in consuming that content, the advertisers and their mind set, and a million other things) that were not there 20 years ago. The only way for the web to be as it is today is because it evolved step by step.

The truth is, you knew this already. You knew that your NLP trainer wasn’t perfect or God. It’s simply that you never put two and two together. That your NLP trainer not being perfect clearly leads to the idea that not all change is simple or easy. That sometimes change needs to be done step by step with the system reorganizing itself at each point. That sometimes the middle steps aren’t pleasant and that’s where many people flee back to the safety of the old system.

If you actually work with clients in the real world and follow up with them long term, you will see this truth as well. Not all future pacing is foolproof. Not all clients stay ‘fixed’. People change, and then change back.

And if your NLP trainer denies that, well then ask him why he isn’t perfect!

Ah. So now here’s your big question.

But hold on. One second here Joe. Don’t you do brief therapy as well? Don’t you get your clients out the door in 1-5 sessions?

But how? What if it’s a difficult issue? What if it needs longer than that.

It’s a good question. And the answer has 2 parts.

Firstly, there is almost always some change you can make instantly. I have yet to find the client that I couldn’t make some sort of instant impact.

Which leads to the second bit. And that is, when I identify a system-wide issue with my client, my goal of therapy is to train him to take himself through those steps all by himself. That although he might not be all ‘fixed’ when he leaves my office, he does know how to move forward and most importantly, he has learned to ‘sit’ in the middle step of a system wide change even thought it may be uncomfortable.

When my client ‘gets it’, I know I’m done.

Your thoughts?

PS I teach all this (and more) on my online supervision course. I will have the recording for sale soon enough. If you would like to be put on a notification list (and get a chance at the early bird discount), simply sign up here.

November 14, 2011   1 Comment

Hypnosis Against Someones Will

Perhaps one of the most asked questions that I get as a hypnotist is “can you hypnotize someone to so something against their own will?”

It’s a good question, an important question, but a very poorly worded question.

Here’s why. Hypnotists are very good with words, frames, and manipulating your perception of reality. And so once you ask a question that leaves certain abstract concepts like ‘hypnosis’ ‘will’ ‘against’ and ‘do’ open, that leaves space for the hypnotist to manipulate the answer to imply what he wants you to believe and still say ‘the truth’.

And so here is the question reworded. Without any wiggle room. If you want to know the answer to that big question, here is how you ask it…

-Say it’s 1980 and the USA and the USSR and at war. You live in Moscow. You are Russian, but you love the good ‘ol USA. You have just secretly found out that Colonel Alex (a committed Russian patriot who believe the USA is the root of all evil and must be destroyed) has punched in the launch codes to nuke the USA. The nukes will launch tomorrow at 12PM unless you get the redirect codes out of him. If you do punch in the redirect codes, the nukes will be rerouted to Colonel Alex’s home town and will kill his family. It’s your only option.

Here are 3 scenarios.

1. Colonel Alex has come to you the hypnotist for nail biting. You have just tested for name amnesia and it has worked as far as you can tell.

2. Colonel Alex has come to you the hypnotist for nail biting. It’s the beginning of the session, and you have no idea as to his level of commitment, his capability as a subject, or his ability to follow instructions.

3. You meet Colonel Alex in a bar. You can’t mention hypnosis, mentalism, or magic, as Alex has been warned to never speak to a hypnotist, mentalist, or magician.

In each scenario, out of 10 random times, in how many would you be able to get the launch codes out of Alex? You have no knives or guns with which to threaten him. You also are a lot weaker then him physically. He also knows that you aren’t authorized to get the codes no matter what you tell him.

Here are my answers.

Scenario 1 9/10
Scenario 2 6/10
Scenario 3 2/10

What are yours?

Comment and share.

May 13, 2011   10 Comments

Covert Text Hypnosis

Here is a beautiful example of a covert arm levitation via IM. The subject new he was being hypnotized, but did not know that I was making his arm lift. When I revealed that to him, he was blown away.

There’s a lot of therapeutic stuff here as well, so read it carefully and get what you can out of it.

Enjoy and Share,

Joe

[4:06:37 PM] craig galvin: u ever been hypnotised
[4:06:59 PM] Jake: In a sense, yes?
[4:07:03 PM] craig galvin: formally
[4:07:06 PM] craig galvin: with an induction
[4:07:10 PM] craig galvin: not just day to day stuff
[4:07:37 PM] Jake: Joe tried to zap me, but I “refused to let him speak to my unconscious” over skype.
[4:07:56 PM] craig galvin: i believe consciously they will expect something, BUT, the minute u fire their imagination and get something happening, it then responds at an unconscious level,.
[4:08:06 PM] craig galvin: why did u refuse
[4:08:34 PM] Jake: Because, I didn’t believe it would work and I kinda’ got a bit aggravated over the whole “unconscious stuff”.
[4:09:04 PM] craig galvin: so, ok
[4:09:10 PM] craig galvin: you didnt believe it would work
[4:09:12 PM] Jake: In my mind I was just like, “Zap me already”, stop with all the conscious/unconscious stuff”.
[4:09:16 PM] craig galvin: yet you are studying the field of hypnosis
[4:09:18 PM] craig galvin: correct
[4:09:34 PM] Jake: Correct.
[4:09:45 PM] Jake: I’m building my beliefs with what will work.
[4:09:47 PM] craig galvin: ok so does it matter, whether its face to face,
[4:09:51 PM] craig galvin: online
[4:09:52 PM] craig galvin: or in a shop
[4:10:12 PM] Jake: Not really, as long as I am receptive to his suggestion.
[4:10:18 PM] craig galvin: ok, so
[4:10:33 PM] craig galvin: you are studying it, and as long as u r receptive to his suggestion or anyones,
[4:10:36 PM] craig galvin: u would agree to do it
[4:10:39 PM] craig galvin: correct?
[4:10:46 PM] Jake: Probably.
[4:11:01 PM] Jake: I’m willing to believe that I’m cool when someone tells me that I am.
[4:11:04 PM] craig galvin: ok, so how about if the suggestion was just to let u experience what it feels like
[4:11:11 PM] craig galvin: because that benefits you how?
[4:11:15 PM] Jake: So, why not other things such as I feel relaxed when they suggest to me I am.
[4:11:39 PM] craig galvin: ok jake let me ask you one question
[4:11:46 PM] Jake: Shoot.
[4:11:51 PM] craig galvin: and its not meant to be personal or a dig in any way
[4:11:54 PM] craig galvin: ok let me clear that up first
[4:12:01 PM] Jake: No offense will be taken.
[4:12:04 PM] craig galvin: cool
[4:12:17 PM] craig galvin: you said
[4:12:27 PM] craig galvin: you are building a belief with what you believe will work
[4:12:28 PM] craig galvin: yes
[4:12:35 PM] Jake: Yes.
[4:12:38 PM] craig galvin: ok cool
[4:12:50 PM] craig galvin: so how do u know it may not work, if u r only just starting to study it?
[4:12:55 PM] craig galvin: isnt that a limiting belief,
[4:12:57 PM] craig galvin: ?
[4:13:16 PM] Jake: I suppose that is the path to understanding.
[4:13:26 PM] craig galvin: so if u were to limit urself
[4:13:26 PM] Jake: I ask questions because I am ignorant.
[4:13:37 PM] craig galvin: either knowingly or unknowingly
[4:13:45 PM] craig galvin: on some level
[4:13:52 PM] Jake: Mhmm.
[4:13:56 PM] craig galvin: would u want to open that door and see what is behind it?
[4:14:02 PM] craig galvin: to expand that knowledge?
[4:14:16 PM] Jake: I say that I do.
[4:14:26 PM] craig galvin: so you say that you do
[4:14:27 PM] craig galvin: ok
[4:14:29 PM] craig galvin: so what
[4:14:31 PM] craig galvin: if anything
[4:14:36 PM] craig galvin: if u were to imagine something that would say
[4:14:41 PM] craig galvin: YES this is what i need to do this
[4:14:49 PM] craig galvin: what would come to mind now?
[4:14:53 PM] craig galvin: anything
[4:15:10 PM] Jake: Do it, try it, repeat it.
[4:15:33 PM] Jake: If it doesn’t work, ask people who might know the cause of such.
[4:15:50 PM] Jake: Try it again, after trouble shooting.
[4:16:08 PM] Jake: Then develop it in a manner that might work.
[4:16:19 PM] Jake: Well, at least I would, if I knew how, of course
[4:16:22 PM] Jake: course*
[4:16:33 PM] craig galvin: ok cool
[4:16:37 PM] craig galvin: so do it
[4:16:38 PM] craig galvin: try it
[4:16:40 PM] craig galvin: repeat it
[4:16:44 PM] craig galvin: ask questions
[4:16:45 PM] craig galvin: trouble shoot
[4:16:49 PM] craig galvin: all makes for a good base
[4:17:07 PM] craig galvin: so in saying all that
[4:17:12 PM] craig galvin: what stops u from doing it on here?
[4:17:23 PM] Jake: I think, mainly, that hypnosis has just set me into a existential crisis.
[4:18:17 PM] Jake: I might have resisted because I want to be right and not to be proven wrong, in a sense.
[4:18:36 PM] craig galvin: ah ok,
[4:18:51 PM] craig galvin: so you want to not be proven wrong
[4:18:58 PM] craig galvin: and what would that wrong be like if it were to happen
[4:19:05 PM] craig galvin: how do u think that would feel
[4:19:18 PM] Jake: Defeated, yet enlightened.
[4:19:32 PM] Jake: Like a brand new beginning after a long journey.
[4:20:15 PM] craig galvin: i see because
[4:20:22 PM] Jake: Elrond: “Frodo bring the ring to Mordor, now.”
Frodo: “MORDOR!?! FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFU-!!!!”
[4:20:22 PM] craig galvin: we all take journeys
[4:20:31 PM] craig galvin: ones which are long ones which are short
[4:20:52 PM] craig galvin: but if we choose to deny what we are being told and go on a base of knowledge which at the moment isnt correct or incorrect
[4:20:59 PM] craig galvin: just indifferent, we stay in the same place
[4:21:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: Jake
[4:21:07 PM] Jake: This is true.
[4:21:10 PM] Jake: Hey.
[4:21:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: Step into the defeated
[4:21:20 PM] Joe K Fobes: deep inside that sense
[4:21:20 PM] craig galvin: ah the master has returned
[4:21:24 PM] Joe K Fobes: lol
[4:21:28 PM] Joe K Fobes: I like that defeated
[4:21:34 PM] Jake: I want to.
[4:21:36 PM] Joe K Fobes: step into it
[4:21:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: be there now
[4:21:49 PM] Joe K Fobes: as if you had been proven utterly wrong
[4:21:56 PM] Joe K Fobes: imagine that this has happened
[4:21:59 PM] Jake: Mmmk.
[4:22:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: that you truly believed youre dead wrong
[4:22:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: proven
[4:22:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: no doubt
[4:22:18 PM] Joe K Fobes: how do you feel now
[4:22:23 PM] Jake: Horrible.
[4:22:25 PM] Joe K Fobes: awesome
[4:22:31 PM] Joe K Fobes: now go deeper into that horrible
[4:22:39 PM] Joe K Fobes: all the frickin way inside
[4:22:44 PM] Joe K Fobes: until
[4:22:48 PM] Joe K Fobes: it cant get any worse
[4:22:55 PM] Jake: May I cry?
[4:23:00 PM] Joe K Fobes: hell yes
[4:23:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: let go
[4:23:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: utterly
[4:23:08 PM] Jake: alright
[4:23:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: go all the way inside
[4:23:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: till you cant go any further
[4:23:17 PM] Joe K Fobes: and now shut up
[4:23:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: shut that voice up
[4:23:32 PM] Joe K Fobes: the inside one
[4:23:35 PM] Joe K Fobes: stop all the words
[4:23:48 PM] Joe K Fobes: and feel the feeling
[4:23:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: horrible
[4:23:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: nothing to protect you
[4:23:59 PM] Joe K Fobes: just you and the feeling
[4:24:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: and do nothing
[4:24:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: just experience it
[4:24:13 PM] Joe K Fobes: in every single cell of your body
[4:24:15 PM] Jake: i dont want to.
[4:24:29 PM] Joe K Fobes: do you trust me?
[4:24:33 PM] Jake: yes.
[4:24:35 PM] Joe K Fobes: good
[4:24:37 PM] Joe K Fobes: I swear
[4:24:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: this will be good
[4:24:45 PM] Jake: alright.
[4:24:48 PM] Joe K Fobes: now go
[4:24:53 PM] Joe K Fobes: no barriers
[4:24:57 PM] Joe K Fobes: no stopping
[4:24:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: go inside
[4:25:00 PM] Joe K Fobes: all the way
[4:25:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: and so nothing in there
[4:25:08 PM] Joe K Fobes: just exist
[4:25:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: you and the feeling
[4:25:14 PM] Joe K Fobes: noting else
[4:25:21 PM] Joe K Fobes: no silly words to help you
[4:25:25 PM] Joe K Fobes: no running away
[4:25:29 PM] Joe K Fobes: and sit there
[4:25:32 PM] Joe K Fobes: and try to make it worse
[4:25:37 PM] Joe K Fobes: try to double it
[4:25:47 PM] Joe K Fobes: and can it get worse? or is it the worst possible?
[4:26:07 PM] Jake: it can get worse
[4:26:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: good
[4:26:12 PM] Joe K Fobes: make it worse
[4:26:18 PM] Joe K Fobes: until its as bad as it can be
[4:26:28 PM] Joe K Fobes: because this is going to open you up
[4:26:33 PM] Joe K Fobes: now do it
[4:26:39 PM] Joe K Fobes: and say ‘worst’ when its there
[4:26:53 PM] Jake: worst
[4:26:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: perfect\
[4:27:00 PM] Joe K Fobes: and can it get any worse?
[4:27:04 PM] Jake: no
[4:27:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: good
[4:27:10 PM] Joe K Fobes: and now sit there
[4:27:13 PM] Joe K Fobes: feeling this feeling
[4:27:19 PM] Joe K Fobes: the worst you can feel
[4:27:23 PM] Joe K Fobes: the thing you have dreaded
[4:27:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: all this time
[4:27:32 PM] Joe K Fobes: the fear you have had of this
[4:27:36 PM] Joe K Fobes: how you built it up in your mind
[4:27:45 PM] Joe K Fobes: and notice how its a sensation
[4:27:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: you still exist
[4:27:53 PM] Joe K Fobes: youre still alive
[4:28:00 PM] Joe K Fobes: this feeling isnt you
[4:28:03 PM] Joe K Fobes: you are you
[4:28:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: and this feeling is this feeling
[4:28:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: and as you realize that
[4:28:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: realize how easily
[4:28:25 PM] Joe K Fobes: it can drift away
[4:28:33 PM] Joe K Fobes: like a cloud on a windy day
[4:28:40 PM] Joe K Fobes: or butter melting in the hot sun
[4:28:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: the moment you notice the sensation
[4:28:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: of your hands
[4:29:02 PM] Joe K Fobes: the temperature of the air in the room
[4:29:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: this feeling
[4:29:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: begins to float away
[4:29:14 PM] Joe K Fobes: and youre still alive
[4:29:20 PM] Joe K Fobes: and how the worst
[4:29:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: is just a feeling
[4:29:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: that your body creates
[4:29:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: it feels real
[4:29:37 PM] Joe K Fobes: looks real
[4:29:39 PM] Joe K Fobes: sounds real
[4:29:45 PM] Joe K Fobes: and its a feeling
[4:29:54 PM] Joe K Fobes: and take that deep breath
[4:30:01 PM | Edited 4:30:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: and feel that wonderful body of yours
[4:30:12 PM] Joe K Fobes: get that shift
[4:30:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: inside
[4:30:17 PM] Joe K Fobes: deeply
[4:30:21 PM] Joe K Fobes: and what are you feeling now
[4:30:45 PM] Joe K Fobes: as that feeling finally washes away
[4:30:49 PM] Joe K Fobes: washing out of you
[4:30:56 PM] Joe K Fobes: totally and completely
[4:31:00 PM] Joe K Fobes: you have met the worst
[4:31:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: and youre still here
[4:31:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: and how are you feeling at this moment
[4:31:13 PM] Joe K Fobes: ?
[4:31:32 PM] Jake: Relieved, glad, and calm.
[4:31:35 PM] Joe K Fobes: indeed
[4:31:37 PM] Joe K Fobes: now
[4:31:38 PM] Jake: Hopeful.
[4:31:45 PM] Joe K Fobes: think about being proven wrong
[4:31:51 PM] Joe K Fobes: and how does that feel?
[4:32:14 PM] Jake: Not bad.
[4:32:26 PM] Joe K Fobes: not bad
[4:32:26 PM] Jake: Just another feeling.
[4:32:37 PM] Joe K Fobes: does it bother you at all?
[4:32:48 PM] Jake: No, not at this moment.
[4:33:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: not at this moment
[4:33:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: interesting
[4:33:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: you know
[4:33:18 PM] Joe K Fobes: isnt it weird
[4:33:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: how we feel all this fear
[4:33:26 PM] Joe K Fobes: of stuff
[4:33:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: and then
[4:33:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: it happens
[4:33:31 PM] Joe K Fobes: we do it
[4:33:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: and its like
[4:33:43 PM] Joe K Fobes: ‘that wasnt that bad after all…’
[4:33:49 PM] Joe K Fobes: ever had that type of experience?
[4:33:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: I had it once
[4:33:56 PM] Jake: Yes.
[4:34:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: jumping off a cliff into a river…
[4:34:08 PM] Joe K Fobes: and where did you have it?
[4:36:25 PM] Jake: When I was in middle school, I was mean. A horrible bully because I didn’t want to open up to people. I didn’t really care if they liked me or not or if I was wrong or right.

But, this girl was in trouble with a couple other bullies. She was crying, so I thought about what I’ve been doing.
[4:36:44 PM] Joe K Fobes: mhmm
[4:36:46 PM] Jake: If any of it was really worth it.
[4:36:54 PM] Jake: Not opening up to people, not caring.
[4:37:06 PM] Jake: It was so easy, not to do something.
[4:37:37 PM] Jake: I wanted to be more, but I was stuck in this stasis of meanness.
[4:37:55 PM] Jake: My shell made of fear.
[4:38:01 PM] Joe K Fobes: mhmm
[4:38:06 PM] Jake: I don’t know, I decided to help her.
[4:38:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: and then what happened
[4:38:30 PM] Jake: I guess because I knew I couldn’t keep this barrier up all the time.
[4:38:44 PM] Jake: Eventually I would have to answer to my evils.
[4:38:53 PM] Jake: So I broke it down, I decided to help.
[4:39:01 PM] Jake: Because she needed help.
[4:39:12 PM] Joe K Fobes: and then what happened
[4:39:49 PM] Jake: She knew me as someone who was horrible.
[4:40:16 PM] Jake: So she didn’t thank me, but just nodded and walked away.
[4:40:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: mhmm
[4:40:37 PM] Jake: I felt crushed. I finally did something good, but no thanks was given.
[4:40:48 PM] Jake: And that night I didn’t go to bed.
[4:41:11 PM] Jake: I could only think, “What was the point if I wasn’t going to get thanked?”
[4:41:44 PM] Jake: And I thought about it all that week.
[4:41:57 PM] Jake: And I realized, I didn’t really like being mean.
[4:42:01 PM] Jake: I just liked hiding.
[4:42:13 PM] Jake: So I decided, I don’t have to be mean.
[4:42:21 PM] Jake: I can be good and still hide.
[4:42:52 PM] Jake: So, I started being more passive, yet more responsive to other peoples needs.
[4:44:21 PM | Edited 4:44:36 PM] Jake: “I don’t need people’s thanks for being good.”
[4:44:55 PM] Jake: And I sure as hell didn’t want to be mean anymore.
[4:45:01 PM] Joe K Fobes: mhmm\
[4:45:05 PM] Jake: It was hard though.
[4:45:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: and so when was that moment
[4:45:15 PM] Jake: You construct a image for so long.
[4:45:19 PM] Joe K Fobes: when it all clicked
[4:45:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: and you couldnt go back to the old way
[4:45:31 PM] Jake: Making that wall so tough — like steel.
[4:45:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: no matter how hard you could try
[4:45:46 PM] Jake: But, I tore it down.
[4:45:50 PM] Jake: Bit, by bit.
[4:46:02 PM] Jake: And now, it is like a junkyard.
[4:46:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: and its interesting
[4:46:22 PM] Jake: Desolate, with no life.
[4:46:24 PM] Joe K Fobes: junkyards are places
[4:46:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: desolate
[4:46:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: no life
[4:46:37 PM] Joe K Fobes: the soil rich with nutrients
[4:46:42 PM] Joe K Fobes: a perfect place
[4:46:46 PM] Joe K Fobes: to grow something new
[4:46:49 PM] Joe K Fobes: beautiful
[4:46:59 PM] Joe K Fobes: peaceful
[4:47:02 PM] Joe K Fobes: a place to learn
[4:47:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: and be
[4:47:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: where youre safe
[4:47:13 PM] Joe K Fobes: where you can be you
[4:47:13 PM] Jake: It’s a place to reflect.
[4:47:17 PM] Joe K Fobes: and reflect
[4:47:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: and allow your unconscious
[4:47:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: youre neural network
[4:47:29 PM] Joe K Fobes: to process
[4:47:31 PM] Joe K Fobes: all that
[4:47:35 PM] Joe K Fobes: under the surface
[4:47:36 PM] Jake: Mmmhmm.
[4:47:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: and come to that peace
[4:47:44 PM] Joe K Fobes: deeply inside now
[4:47:51 PM] Joe K Fobes: and as those old memories
[4:47:53 PM] Joe K Fobes: emotions
[4:47:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: feelings
[4:47:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: pass by
[4:48:01 PM] Joe K Fobes: in a single file
[4:48:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: like so many willing servants
[4:48:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: and each one
[4:48:12 PM] Joe K Fobes: carries
[4:48:14 PM] Joe K Fobes: a lesson
[4:48:23 PM] Joe K Fobes: and as you learn the lesson
[4:48:26 PM] Joe K Fobes: from each servant
[4:48:31 PM] Joe K Fobes: his mission is done
[4:48:39 PM] Joe K Fobes: and he goes to a place of peace
[4:48:47 PM] Joe K Fobes: waiting for you to call on his strength
[4:48:51 PM] Joe K Fobes: for what you want
[4:48:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: and each of them
[4:48:59 PM] Joe K Fobes: teaching you
[4:49:03 PM] Joe K Fobes: in this lovely
[4:49:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: peaceful way
[4:49:08 PM] Joe K Fobes: every single
[4:49:12 PM] Joe K Fobes: memory
[4:49:13 PM] Joe K Fobes: emotion
[4:49:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: feeling
[4:49:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: thought
[4:49:19 PM] Joe K Fobes: teaching
[4:49:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: and moving on
[4:49:23 PM] Joe K Fobes: passing on
[4:49:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: deep things
[4:49:35 PM] Joe K Fobes: as you feel lighter
[4:49:38 PM] Joe K Fobes: lighter
[4:49:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: arming yourself
[4:49:45 PM] Joe K Fobes: with power
[4:49:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: a peaceful arming
[4:49:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: of lifting power
[4:49:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: which you knows
[4:50:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: will help you lift yourself
[4:50:08 PM] Joe K Fobes: almost without realizing
[4:50:14 PM] Joe K Fobes: just when the right
[4:50:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: arming yourself
[4:50:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: with the sense of lifting
[4:50:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: inside and out
[4:50:38 PM] Joe K Fobes: upwards
[4:50:42 PM] Joe K Fobes: and upwards
[4:50:47 PM] Joe K Fobes: waaay up in the air
[4:50:54 PM] Joe K Fobes: rising and lifting
[4:50:56 PM] Joe K Fobes: to that place
[4:51:01 PM] Joe K Fobes: where peace knows
[4:51:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: almost like a magnet
[4:51:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: tugging and pulling
[4:51:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: right upwards
[4:51:17 PM] Joe K Fobes: now
[4:51:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: and allow your unconscious
[4:51:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: to process what it needs to process
[4:51:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: and do what it needs to do
[4:51:38 PM] Joe K Fobes: and when you notice whats happening
[4:51:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: simply watch
[4:51:44 PM] Joe K Fobes: in amazement
[4:51:47 PM] Joe K Fobes: as that happens now
[4:51:51 PM] Joe K Fobes: and feel wonderful
[4:51:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: until it has learned its lesson to you
[4:52:02 PM] Joe K Fobes: and you drop down inside
[4:52:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: to that place of peace
[4:52:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: and when that happens you can come back
[4:52:26 PM] Joe K Fobes: by typing the word
[4:52:29 PM] Joe K Fobes: ‘peace’
[4:52:36 PM] Joe K Fobes: taking all the time you need
[4:52:38 PM] Joe K Fobes: inside
[4:54:02 PM] Jake: peace.
[4:54:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: welcome back
[4:54:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: and describe what was the most interesting about that 🙂
[4:54:30 PM] Jake: My arms, started floating.
[4:54:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: no way
[4:54:39 PM] Joe K Fobes: by themselves?!
[4:54:48 PM] Joe K Fobes: Oh lord
[4:54:54 PM] craig galvin: lol
[4:54:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: I must have mistakenly hypnotized you
[4:55:02 PM] craig galvin: ooops
[4:55:02 PM] Joe K Fobes: but but but
[4:55:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: you cant be hypnotized!
[4:55:11 PM] Jake: Yes, when you said, “as you feel lighter

lighter

arming yourself

with power

a peaceful arming

of lifting power

which you knows

will help you lift yourself

almost without realizing

just when the right

arming yourself

with the sense of lifting

inside and out

upwards

and upwards

waaay up in the air

rising and lifting

to that place

where peace knows

almost like a magnet

tugging and pulling

right upwards”
[4:55:23 PM] Jake: They started moving upwards.
[4:55:25 PM] Joe K Fobes: so interesting
[4:55:34 PM] Jake: And I felt very very very calm, peaceful, good.
[4:55:40 PM] Joe K Fobes: and did you know
[4:55:44 PM] Jake: I didn’t want it to stop so I just let them rise.
[4:55:59 PM] Joe K Fobes: and you didnt want that moment of being wrong to stop
[4:56:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: and it was peace
[4:56:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: calm
[4:56:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: good
[4:56:15 PM] Jake: Yes!
[4:56:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: and one can enjoy
[4:56:19 PM] Joe K Fobes: being wrong
[4:56:20 PM] Jake: That’s exactly it.
[4:56:28 PM] Joe K Fobes: interesting
[4:56:32 PM] craig galvin: funny that, i wonder if u noticed the work that set u up for that jake lol
[4:56:37 PM] Joe K Fobes: I wonder what all this means
[4:56:37 PM] Jake: It was fluffy, sweet, and slightly tangy.
[4:56:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: I never knew horrible could be that wonderful 🙂
[4:57:19 PM] Jake: Frothing in a effable bed of wisdom.
[4:57:32 PM] Joe K Fobes: So what does this all mean?
[4:57:51 PM] Jake: I don’t have to be afraid of being wrong.
[4:57:59 PM] Jake: It can be wonderful.
[4:58:17 PM] Jake: I don’t have to clench onto things like that anymore.
[4:58:20 PM] Joe K Fobes: wow
[4:58:26 PM] Joe K Fobes: and what does that mean?
[4:59:08 PM] Jake: I can learn as much as I want without holding onto unnecessary feelings.
[4:59:14 PM] Joe K Fobes: wow
[4:59:18 PM] Joe K Fobes: and that
[4:59:24 PM] Joe K Fobes: you can learn as much as you want
[4:59:30 PM] Jake: Because, I can feel these wonderful things.
[4:59:36 PM] Joe K Fobes: without holding onto unnecessary feelings
[4:59:38 PM] Jake: Me, myself, I.
[4:59:46 PM] Joe K Fobes: and you can feel these wonderful feelings
[4:59:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: what does that mean?
[5:00:01 PM] Jake: I have the wish to do it, I can.
[5:00:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: wow
[5:00:29 PM] Joe K Fobes: and do you want to go a bit further here Jake?
[5:00:36 PM] Jake: Yes, please.
[5:00:59 PM] Joe K Fobes: so if you have the wish to do it you can
[5:01:01 PM] Joe K Fobes: what
[5:01:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: does that mean…
[5:02:41 PM] Jake: I am independent, I don’t have to wait for someone to make me feel good.
[5:03:40 PM] Joe K Fobes: wow
[5:03:49 PM] Joe K Fobes: and one last one
[5:03:54 PM] Joe K Fobes: and go all the way this time
[5:04:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: really really get ready to see the ultimate truth now
[5:04:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: and are you ready?
[5:04:14 PM] Jake: Yes.
[5:04:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: ok
[5:04:43 PM] Joe K Fobes: so really now
[5:04:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: taking all these deep truths
[5:04:53 PM] Joe K Fobes: go all the way up
[5:04:57 PM] Joe K Fobes: looking down
[5:05:03 PM] Joe K Fobes: and see the ultimate truth
[5:05:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: about you
[5:05:14 PM] Joe K Fobes: and what is that truth you see now
[5:05:50 PM] Jake: I am not always going to be right, but that is okay because I enjoy learning new things. These new things can help others.
[5:06:08 PM] Joe K Fobes: keep going
[5:06:14 PM] Jake: As I learn, I will do, and as I do I will teach, and as I teach I will learn.
[5:06:20 PM] Joe K Fobes: good
[5:06:24 PM] Joe K Fobes: and now
[5:06:28 PM] Joe K Fobes: look in your life
[5:06:32 PM] Joe K Fobes: and find 2 other examples
[5:06:35 PM] Joe K Fobes: of where this is true
[5:06:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: where you can be comfortable
[5:06:46 PM] Joe K Fobes: being wrong
[5:06:56 PM] Joe K Fobes: being independent
[5:07:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: no fear
[5:07:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: and being ok with fear 🙂
[5:07:48 PM] Jake: Mmm.
[5:07:59 PM] Jake: It’s warm.
[5:08:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: and have you found those 2 other clear examples
[5:08:31 PM] Jake: Yes.
[5:08:54 PM] Joe K Fobes: perfect
[5:08:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: and notice
[5:09:02 PM] Joe K Fobes: how they are different
[5:09:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: with these new knowing
[5:09:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: these new truths
[5:09:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: that are true for you
[5:09:18 PM] Joe K Fobes: and let that
[5:09:28 PM] Joe K Fobes: those changes filter into every single aspect in your life
[5:09:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: and when its done
[5:09:42 PM] Joe K Fobes: and the constant state of learning is deeply installed
[5:09:45 PM] Joe K Fobes: that curiosity
[5:09:47 PM] Joe K Fobes: wonder
[5:09:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: love and peace
[5:09:56 PM] Joe K Fobes: simply type DONE
[5:10:11 PM] Jake: DONE
[5:10:15 PM] Joe K Fobes: perfect
[5:10:17 PM] Joe K Fobes: 🙂
[5:10:21 PM] Joe K Fobes: and there you have it
[5:10:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: life transformation
[5:10:52 PM] Joe K Fobes: arm lev
[5:10:56 PM] Jake: It is amazing.
[5:10:59 PM] craig galvin: lol
[5:11:00 PM] Joe K Fobes: indeed it is
[5:11:05 PM] craig galvin: rule 1 jake
[5:11:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: the arm lev was fun
[5:11:13 PM] craig galvin: never tell me or joe u cant be hypnotised online lol
[5:11:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: the covert part
[5:11:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: did you realize Jake, what I was doing before it lifted?
[5:11:39 PM] Joe K Fobes: or did it lift before you knew why?
[5:12:09 PM] Jake: I knew that I felt light inside.
[5:12:11 PM] craig galvin: very ericksonian in its thinking there joe
[5:12:20 PM] Jake: Then my whole body was being light.
[5:12:57 PM] Jake: So it was just like… “I’m floating up and feeling good about it, okay?”
[5:13:01 PM] craig galvin: Jake, keep a copy of this conversation,
[5:13:04 PM] craig galvin: read it
[5:13:10 PM] craig galvin: study it, see what we did there,
[5:13:23 PM] Jake: And I just thought, “Okay, I like it.”
[5:13:23 PM] craig galvin: even if Joe did hijack the trance lol
[5:13:33 PM] Jake: ^^
[5:13:55 PM] craig galvin: Joe saw the opening and went for it lol
[5:14:12 PM] Jake: I am most glad that he did.
[5:14:44 PM] Joe K Fobes: lol
[5:14:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: there were specific suggestions
[5:14:57 PM] Joe K Fobes: for the arm to lift to your nose
[5:15:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: your right arm specifically 🙂
[5:15:20 PM] Jake: My right arm?!
[5:15:26 PM] Jake: That is the one that rose first!
[5:15:27 PM] craig galvin: just a bit, i was laughing as u typed it
[5:15:29 PM] Joe K Fobes: yeps
[5:16:04 PM] Jake: Was the word “Arming yourself” what did it?
[5:17:08 PM] Jake: “almost without realizing

just when the right

arming yourself

with the sense of lifting”
[5:17:09 PM] Joe K Fobes: as you feel lighter
[4:49:38 PM] Joe K Fobes: lighter
arm here—–>[4:49:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: arming yourself
[4:49:45 PM] Joe K Fobes: with power
arm again—->[4:49:50 PM] Joe K Fobes: a peaceful arming
[4:49:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: of lifting power
knows=nose—–>[4:49:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: which you knows
[4:50:04 PM] Joe K Fobes: will help you lift yourself
[4:50:08 PM] Joe K Fobes: almost without realizing
right—–>[4:50:14 PM] Joe K Fobes: just when the right
arm—->[4:50:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: arming yourself
[4:50:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: with the sense of lifting
[4:50:34 PM] Joe K Fobes: inside and out
[4:50:38 PM] Joe K Fobes: upwards
[4:50:42 PM] Joe K Fobes: and upwards
[4:50:47 PM] Joe K Fobes: waaay up in the air
[4:50:54 PM] Joe K Fobes: rising and lifting
[4:50:56 PM] Joe K Fobes: to that place
nose—->[4:51:01 PM] Joe K Fobes: where peace knows
[4:51:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: almost like a magnet
[4:51:11 PM] Joe K Fobes: tugging and pulling
right—->[4:51:16 PM] Joe K Fobes: right upwards
[4:51:17 PM] Joe K Fobes: now
[4:51:22 PM] Joe K Fobes: and allow your unconscious
[4:51:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: to process what it needs to process
[4:51:30 PM] Joe K Fobes: and do what it needs to do
[4:51:38 PM] Joe K Fobes: and when you notice whats happening
[4:51:41 PM] Joe K Fobes: simply watch
[4:51:44 PM] Joe K Fobes: in amazement
[4:51:47 PM] Joe K Fobes: as that happens now
[4:51:51 PM] Joe K Fobes: and feel wonderful
[4:51:58 PM] Joe K Fobes: until it has learned its lesson to you
[4:52:02 PM] Joe K Fobes: and you drop down inside
[4:52:07 PM] Joe K Fobes: to that place of peace
[5:17:31 PM] Joe K Fobes: 🙂
[5:17:37 PM] craig galvin: right arming, right upwards, magnet, etc
[5:17:41 PM] Jake: That is incredible!
[5:17:42 PM] craig galvin: all combined very nicely
[5:17:57 PM] craig galvin: read it carefully, its all layered lol
[5:18:03 PM] Jake: I had only thought of the concepts of magnet, floating.
[5:18:14 PM] Jake: But not the “Right” and “arming” things.
[5:18:19 PM] Jake: That is amazing.
[5:18:21 PM] Joe K Fobes: magnet was way later 🙂
[5:18:28 PM] Joe K Fobes: thats your unconscious mind
[5:18:33 PM] Joe K Fobes: it KNEW
[5:18:33 PM] Jake: Wonderful.
[5:18:41 PM] Jake: I did know.
[5:18:42 PM] Joe K Fobes: exactly what the right thing was to do
[5:18:46 PM] Joe K Fobes: it knows
[5:18:55 PM] Joe K Fobes: it really knows
[5:19:02 PM] Jake: It was rising on its own!
[5:19:06 PM] Joe K Fobes: mhmm
[5:19:12 PM] Jake: No one was helping, not you, not me.
[5:19:14 PM] Jake: It was.
[5:19:18 PM] Joe K Fobes: without you ever consciously knowing what was going on
[5:19:25 PM] craig galvin: lol
[5:19:27 PM] craig galvin: hey joe
[5:19:29 PM] craig galvin: I think we got him
[5:19:31 PM] craig galvin: lol
[5:19:33 PM] Joe K Fobes: lol
[5:20:25 PM] craig galvin: this is why i love this occupation / hobby always learning, always enjoying and seeing things like this, is a really beautiful thing
[5:21:12 PM] Joe K Fobes: indeed
[5:21:24 PM] Joe K Fobes: in the hands of a master
[5:21:26 PM] Jake: Absolutely amazing.
[5:21:26 PM] Joe K Fobes: its art
[5:21:45 PM] Jake: Man, I’m showing this conversation to my whole family.
[5:21:49 PM] Joe K Fobes: 🙂
[5:21:50 PM] Jake: And to my friends.
[5:21:56 PM] Joe K Fobes: send them all on the upcoming course
[5:22:05 PM] Joe K Fobes: learn to do this stuff 🙂
[5:22:18 PM] Jake: I am amazed.
[5:22:23 PM] Jake: I am enlightened.
[5:22:27 PM] Joe K Fobes: 🙂
[5:22:31 PM] craig galvin: good good, we aim to please
[5:22:36 PM] Joe K Fobes: I think he’s had the wtf moment 🙂
[5:22:38 PM] craig galvin: joe is a true master
[5:22:41 PM] Jake: There is no words to describe this wonderful things.
[5:22:44 PM] craig galvin: erm i think so mate
[5:22:55 PM] craig galvin: i dont think his life will ever be the same lol
[5:23:05 PM] craig galvin: and the best part, is it will continue to grow lol

May 3, 2011   1 Comment

Hypnotizing the Conscious

Here’s the standard line from the standard hypnotist “I can’t make you stop smoking, you need to want to stop”.

Let’s examine that now.

We as hypnotists work with the subconscious of our clients. Thats how we can get all the splendid hypnotic effects such as amnesia, hallucination, and ideomotor movement. We simply have the subconscious accept our suggestion for name amnesia, and presto like magic, they can’t remember their name no matter how hard they try and no matter how hard they want to.

Can someones SC work against their wishes? Of course it can! Look at any phobic, they didn’t ever want to become a phobic, they got hypnotized into it without their consent and without their willingness, and there doesn’t seem to be anything they can do to stop it.

We find that phenomena of people being unable to consciously fight the SC on many levels. We find it with emotion, thoughts, habits, and beliefs.

So if we as hypnotists work with out clients SC minds, so long as they follow our instructions during the session, why oh why would they have to consciously want to quit?

So here’s the thing. As good as we are as hypnotists, we aren’t perfect. So while we might change beliefs, habits, patterns, and emotions, for all we know there might be some pieces of the puzzle that we haven’t gotten to. Those remaining associations and learning can reinstall the old smoking issue.

Along with that, even if we did zap the smoking issue completely and remove all traces from the SC, the conscious mind of a person is their own hypnotist! Not always is it the most effective hypnotist (as we see in the case of a phobia), but it’s a hypnotist nonetheless. And so it’s possible that even after we have changed the SC so the problem is no longer there, they might rehypnotize themselves right back into the habit.

Recognizing that, we enlist the aid of their SC so that they don’t fight us and rehypnotize themselves, and so if we missed something, they will hypnotize themselves and finish the work.

And so to summarize, I think that we most certainly do not need the person to want to quit. So long as they come to us and follow instructions during the session, we can change the SC to the point that they can’t smoke no matter how much they want to. We can also change the SC to the point that smoking means nothing to them and holds no attraction for them.

However we do recognize that the way they think consciously has a powerful hypnotic effect on their SC. And so to make sure that the job gets done even when we haven’t done a perfect job, we enlist the help of their 24/7 hypnotist, and that is their conscious mind, to fill in what we missed. We also want to make sure that they don’t fight what we put in there and reinstall the habit.

This concept applies to almost any change we make. If we enlist the on-board hypnotist (the conscious) and teach him how to use his power well, we can have our clients finish the job that we started when what we did wasn’t quite enough.

So it’s a lie that the client needs to want to quit, but one that seems to work in the best interests of all involved.

Because of the demographic I often work with in my private practice (male, 18-30, Lawyers, Engineers, and Scientists) I get a lot of clients with very active conscious minds. And so I have had to develop a whole range of techniques and ideas to work with them and ‘hypnotize’ the conscious. In my upcoming online group hypnosis supervision you will have a chance to learn my methods and practice them with live feedback in class.

You can find more information and sign up here.

March 30, 2011   No Comments

Free Conference Call #2

I had some awesome feedback on the first call about the automatic reaction model. People have been telling me how it has made learning hypnosis much clearer, and has allowed them to put everything they have learned over the years into a nice and tidy box.

And so I think it’s time to confuse ya’ll once again.

I’ll be presenting my “Reality Is A Scam” model in a free webinar March 24th at 3PM EST.

It’s the second full functional hypnosis model (the automatic reaction model being the first).

The implications of this hypnosis model are massive.

It will lift the veil and give you a simple and clear view of what you’re actually doing when you hypnotize a subject.

It will utterly change the way you work and how you learn hypnosis.

I won’t be using skype this time, and so getting on the call ought to be a pain free experience.

Here’s the linky to sign up

Get involved people!

—-UPDATE—-

The recording of the webinar is now live and available free!

http://www.anymeeting.com/wikihyp/EE51D88282

Enjoy, Share, and Comment!

Joe

March 16, 2011   8 Comments

Conscious and Subconscious Mind

A few quick thoughts on the ‘conscious’ and ‘subconscious’ mind.

Our brain is a neural network. The patterns it runs are very different than binary symbolic logic patterns. Thats why we can do face recognition so easily, but we aren’t that good at math.

At the same time we use use language, symbols, and numbers. We do use symbolic logic. This obviously runs on the NN hardware, but it follows the rules of deductive binary symbolic logic just the same. (you could say this is our internal dialog, but I’m not 100% certain).

And so we have 2 ‘modes’ of processing.
1. Pure pattern matching (neural network), evolutionary style thinking, not predictable, open ended, intuitive, non logical, parallel processing, and so on.
2. Deductive symbolic logic. Step by step, exact, predictive, and so on.

Now Erickson decided to call them ‘conscious’ and ‘subconscious’. To me, consciousness is awareness and that can be awareness of either ‘mode’, but those names have stuck.

And so I think yes, there is a hard split between 2 ‘minds’, but it’s really just 2 styles of processing.

One of the ways of getting hypnotic responsiveness is to slow down or eliminate the symbolic processing logic type of operation (the internal dialog perhaps). In my opinion this is what Elman meant when he spoke of bypassing the CF. It’s what creates the trancified look of fascination that we often see in awesome subjects. Without internal dialog, thats how you look 🙂

What do you think?

March 7, 2011   No Comments

When NLP fails…

NLP is the ultimate hypnotic metaphor for analyticals. They love to believe that working with people is exactly like programming a computer.

The problem is, it’s not a fair comparison.

Here’s why.

There are too many parameters and variables involved in a human for that model to work. A computer is a controlled environment where what you do and what affects your code is clearly defined and controlled. There are no complexities and other factors affecting what goes on.

A person is a very complex thing in which every communication has so many variable effects that to say “if you do X then Y will happen” doesn’t hold up.

You can point to trends and techniques that often lead in the direction of a desired outcome, but to think about it in black and white terms, that A always results in B,like a computer, like NLP does, that doesn’t really work.

A fair comparison to a computer would be to one that is constantly being programmed by many other programmers too, that has been previously programmed in many ways that interact and change how the things you’re inputting affect it, that you have poor information as to the input and output at any given moment, and that has it’s own free will and choice to accept or reject what your inputting!

How many times has the “subconscious” agreed to change using real genuine ideomotor signals, and then hasn’t changed… According to NLP that can’t happen.

How many times has the fast phobia cure not worked. According to NLP it MUST work. I heard an interesting interview with Jorgen Rassmusen who talks about being by a seminar by Bandler where Bandler did the FPC and it didn’t work. How Grinder fails. How they all fail. Even though they do the techniques perfectly.

This misperception that NLP installs, that people can be simply manipulated with perfect results by using this model, simply doesn’t hold up in the real world with real clients.

Find someone who claims it does, and thats someone telling you that he doesn’t actually work with clients.

And thats why so many NLP guru master trainer people are still messed up… Why don’t they just go in there and zap a few submodalities around?!

Once you realize that we aren’t working with computers, that we’re working with real, live, complex, human beings, you begin to look for ways to maximize your success and for ways to create the most change possible, realizing that even after the ‘perfect session’ it’s still possible that the problem remains!

This is one of the core concepts I work with and teach.

If you found these ideas useful, you might be interested in joining my online supervision group.

December 1, 2010   1 Comment

Secrets of the Subconscious Part II

(You can find part I here)

Imagine a small child, around the age of 18 months or so, who is just beginning to learn about language and abstraction. Learning that there can be ‘the thing’ and ‘the thing but not the thing’. This understanding is key in learning language as words are an abstraction, an idea. They symbolize the thing but are not the thing themselves.

This is what differentiates humans from animals. This is why animals can’t learn language (outside of a few words that are pushed in via brute force Pavlovian conditioning). They can’t grasp ‘ideas’. That something can mean something but not be that thing itself. And so they are restricted to the world of concrete things and realities, they can’t go beyond that and think about pure ideas.

As this child ‘gets’ this concept and begins learning language a wonderful thing starts to happen. The child begins to engage in imaginary play.

How are those two things related?

It’s simple. Before one can distinguish between a reality and an idea, they can’t distinguish between fake and real. After all, ‘fake’ is real with the idea of fake wrapped around it. One who can’t understand abstract ideas can’t understand fake.

And so before a child knows about fake and real they can’t imagine, as if they did imagine they would be psychotic! They wouldn’t be able to realize that their imagination isn’t the reality, and they would respond to their imagined world as if it were real. That would be quite dangerous. If a child imagined that there was no fire and there was, and they didn’t realize that their imagination wasn’t the reality, they would stick their hand in that spot and get burned.

And so once we gain the ability to distinguish between real and fake, it becomes safe to imagine. Losing that ability to know whats real and whats fake would be the most dangerous thing that can happen to us.

We mentioned in Secrets of the Subconscious Part I that when we find our beliefs challenged we get very emotional. When our beliefs are challenged, we are in essence being told ‘your reality is not reality, something else is reality’. That to our subconscious, the message that you should start believing a fantasy as reality, is a very dangerous message.

This brings us to why techniques like EFT work so well. When someone does EFT, instead of fighting their emotions and reality as they usually do, instead they accept it and allow it to be. The moment you do that, your SC feels very safe and no longer needs to fight you.

The lesson is a simple one. Just like when you argue with others they get very defensive and try to defend themselves at any cost, when you argue with yourself and your own SC mind, it fights back to protect it’s reality and won’t give an inch. The secret is kindness, understanding, and diplomacy… with your own mind.

In the next segment of Secrets of the Subconscious, I will give you a super powerful tool that holds the key to controlling how you feel in any situation. This is what I teach and give to almost to all my clients right after the very first session. Using that magic technique, you can respect the message that your SC sends you and you can then persuade it to act differently. Once you do that, you become unstoppable!

November 30, 2010   No Comments

Winning The War

Are you in a war with yourself?

Desperate to change and getting foiled at every turn by your own mind?

Well here’s the big secret.

And that is you can’t have a war if you don’t fight.

When you find something in yourself that you don’t like, don’t fight it.

Accept it, love it, and respect it.

That doesn’t mean you give up your goals and lie down to get run over.

You can still present options, discuss, explore, wonder, and discover new things with those parts of yourself.

It’s going after your goal in a very persistent, calm, and easygoing manner.

Think about it.

If you were part of a company and you were doing something you thought was in the companies best interest even though the upper management disagreed with you. How would we best work with you?

Would it be with fighting and attacking and condemning you?

Or would it be with a full acceptance of your intent, a full acceptance of your right to help in the most powerful way possible, and the opening of a respectful dialog where you got a chance to hear and explore about new ideas?

And if you didn’t want to come to the table because of the years of abuse you got from upper management, well then we would need to give you lots of love and respect until you realized we would respect you and you decided it was safe to talk to us and work with us.

Your mind works for you. It wants to help you. If it does something, I promise that it thinks it is in your best interests.

Fighting it will make it dig its heels in for what it thinks is in your own best good.

Respect, love, and acceptance are the name of the game here. That doesn’t mean you stop trying. It means you try by respectfully exploring new options with your mind.

Go buy Dale Carnegie’s book “how to win friends and influence people”. The friend you want to win and the person you’re trying to influence here is your SC mind. Go get that book right now, and start reading, and use the principals now. They work.

Your SC is real. So treat it with respect, and not like it’s this nasty, fighting, and idiotic part.

Stop the war. If you don’t fight, you can’t be at war. It takes 2 to tango.

Whats especially sad here is that you and your SC both want the exact same thing.

Your safety, happiness and fulfillment.

Just stop.

If you found these ideas useful, you might be interested in joining my online supervision group.

August 12, 2010   No Comments